Preach on Oprah, Preach on!!!

Wassup ya'll!!! I know, I know, I'm a little behind on the blog. That's my b, but I'm back!!! If you didn't notice, I'm brown, so you should give me a break considering CP time is a brown thing.

The other day, a friend sent this to me via email. I sat and I read it 3 times over...relating to it more each time . Please read below:


HEAR WHAT OPRAH WINFREY HAD TO SAY ABOUT MEN:

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.

Slower is better.

Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't be friends! A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. Don't settle.

If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
Don't stay because you think "it will get better". You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?

Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.

Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within.

Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are. Even if he has more education or has a better job.

Do not make him into a quasi-god.
He is a man, nothing more...nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow another female's man.
If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.
A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.

All men are NOT dogs.

You should not be the one doing all the bending. Compromise is two way street.

You need time to heal between relationships.There is nothing cute about baggage. Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you.
A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals.
Look for someone complimentary not supplementary.

Dating is fun. Even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr.Right.

Make him miss you sometimes. When a man always knows where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted.

Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man.

Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful.

You should know that:
You're the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he'll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he's not the only one.

They're all watching you, so you have a lot of choices. Make the right one.

Ladies take care of your own hearts.

Hopefully this will make someone smile, another rethink her choices, and another woman prepare.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them and an entire lifetime to forget them.

First, I wanna say to men that ladies CAN be grimy as well, so not only is it to us, but for ya'll too. Second, everything that you read above isn't 100% correct 100% of the time. There are exceptions. I do believe that 100% of that is true 95% of the time, though. Third, there are a few things that really stuck out to me:

1. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
In the words of Chris Tucker, THIS IS RIIIGHT! IT CAN'T GET NO RIGHTER! I'm guilty of making every excuse in the world for a guy...on more than 1 occasion. Ladies (and gents) STOP STOP STOP making excuses for why you and your wanna-be boo aren't together. Too many times I hear females say "I mean, I know he wants to be with me, but...." NO!! Keep it movin boo boo...keep it movin! Do you!! If he decides he wants to come back around later, it's left up to you whether or not you want that. BUT the Bottom line is, if someone really wants to be with you, they will be with you!

2. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't be friends! A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
Because I'm so into friendships, building them, and keeping them, I definitely have the hardest time with this one, but it should be applied. Unfortunately you'll hurt someone you love, its inevitable. Everyone screws up in life, but true friends do NOT continuously hurt you. Someone who truly cares for you will NOT continuously hurt you. Point.Blank.Period!
Note to all: Just because someone breaks up with you doesn't mean they're grimy. If they're being straight up and for some reason can't be in a relationship, yes you'll be hurt, but that's not them being grimy. Remember your heart doesn't always do what your mind tells it to. You can't help who you like, care for, or love, but you can always help how you treat them and the situation you're in with them. Be straight up, do NOT be grimy. I repeat DO NOT BE GRIMY!

3. All men are NOT dogs.
Yes ladies, it's true. As much as I'd like to say they all are, Not all men are dogs. You can't blame every man for the mistakes of the last one. Let go of the baggage....wait, did I really just type that?!?! I can't believe I just typed that!!!

We all know this is common sense stuff. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out, yet we constantly need to be reminded of things like this. Hopefully this will help some people, and remember, this goes for men as well, not just women. Take care of your hearts!

I'm out!

-Raye