The other two stooges knew this blog was coming… 'twas just a matter of time.

Merlot, Syrah, or Shiraz. If you don't recognize one of these three words, slap yourself, sit your ass down, and read this blog.

If you know me like Raye and Dev know me, then you know that I can’t go a week without a glass of wine. Better yet, a few days. If I was stranded on a desert island, and I could bring 3 things with me, they’d consist of – 1. A knife 2. Matches 3. A case of Zolo Torrontes (Argentina) or a case of Santa Ema Reserve Merlot… depending on the climate y’all.

Let’s set the record straight. You can get messed up on HALF a bottle of wine (Average price - $8.00) versus buying a whole bottle of vodka (Average price $15.00, or your liquor of choice –All decent labels, over $10.00). Point blank – wine is for the classy, the beautiful, and the young at heart -with a budget I might add. There is nothing sexier than a sophisticated glass of wine. And everyone wants to be sexy.

Quick overview. There are two types of wine. White Wine and Red Wine. WHITE means- a Sauvignon Blanc, a Chardonnay, a Riesling. On the other hand, RED –a Merlot, Syrah, or Shiraz. People then graduate to a Pinot Noir. And from there they might go into things like a Cabernet Sauvignon. But I digress.

Wine gets its flavor from three different places: the grape itself, the climate where the grapes are grown and the winemaking process – we call this fermentation. If you buy a white wine – store it at 55 degrees. Red wine should be stored at room temperature. Either way, you want to keep the bottle lying on its side, not upright.

One major thing – don’t ever drink wine in a cup. It’s not gonna smell right, and it’s not gonna taste right. Go to target and buy a smaller, tighter glass for white wine, and a fatter glass for red wine. Yes, there is a difference.

Do these steps and you’ll be set for life. Spin the wine around in the glass. You want to look at the legs. Yes, “LEGS.” The legs should slide quickly on the glass, because alcohol moves fast on glass. People spin the wine around and watch the legs drop. They should be an inch long, and there should be about a dozen or so. This is going to show you the alcohol read. If there is not enough alcohol, it is going to taste flat. And we all know Hilary likes her some legs.

Then, you want to taste it and test it. Make sure it does not taste moldy. Remember—LEGS.

For the men reading this blog, you’re probably looking for a deeper, richer style of wine that gets the job done – if these bottles are in your kitchen, trust me, the panties are dropping. Try some Pinot Gris from Alsace or Oregon. A viscous, smooth Aussie Semillon might also work. For a crisper, lighter alternative, aromatic Sauvignon Blanc from New Zealand, the Loire, or certain California wineries might fit the bill. Can’t decide? Chenin Blanc is just the thing – it can have good acidity, but a rounder texture than Sauvignon Blanc.

The downfall? For the PLAYAS - Beringer White Zinfandel (medium-dry, aromas of peach and apricot). Yes, you low lifes can get it at Wal Mart before you roll to old girl’s crib. For the Missouri idiots checkin this out – cop it at bregulla for $5 with your club card. Great for a cheap romantic night alongside some pizza and a movie. True aphrodisiac.

If this blog is starting to bore you, just do me a favor. If you’re at a restaurant – shock your guests, turn on your date, impress the waiter: when prompted, order a glass of “the House Pinot Gris” ( The “S” is silent, screw that up, and slap yourself one more time) .

Better yet, do me the due diligence -- Go to your local grocery store or wine store. Brisk past the boxes of Franzia, the $2 bottles of Andre, and even the oh so tempting $6 bottles of Yellow Tail (such a low class brand of wine that I could hardly build up the humility to type on this intro). Start up your beginner’s palette by going straight to the Chardonnay aisle and pick up a bottle of Robert Mondavi Napa Valley Chardonnay (preffered year, 2005). Yes, what you see on the label is correct. $17.99. But please don’t hesistate. Buy some chex mix or similar brand to help roughen your tongue and try one glass of this, and come back to this blog. And give me your comments.

After this, if you haven’t a) impressed your friends at a restaurant or house party, b) gotten a man/woman to cuddle up with you after 2 measly glasses, or c) this wasn’t the wine you chose for your guests by the time of your wedding, then I haven’t don't my job.

Quote of the Day: Empowerment

"You're time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma--which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary." --S.J.


~Dev

Preach on Oprah, Preach on!!!

Wassup ya'll!!! I know, I know, I'm a little behind on the blog. That's my b, but I'm back!!! If you didn't notice, I'm brown, so you should give me a break considering CP time is a brown thing.

The other day, a friend sent this to me via email. I sat and I read it 3 times over...relating to it more each time . Please read below:


HEAR WHAT OPRAH WINFREY HAD TO SAY ABOUT MEN:

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.

Slower is better.

Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't be friends! A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. Don't settle.

If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
Don't stay because you think "it will get better". You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?

Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.

Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within.

Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are. Even if he has more education or has a better job.

Do not make him into a quasi-god.
He is a man, nothing more...nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow another female's man.
If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.
A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.

All men are NOT dogs.

You should not be the one doing all the bending. Compromise is two way street.

You need time to heal between relationships.There is nothing cute about baggage. Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you.
A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals.
Look for someone complimentary not supplementary.

Dating is fun. Even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr.Right.

Make him miss you sometimes. When a man always knows where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted.

Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man.

Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful.

You should know that:
You're the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he'll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he's not the only one.

They're all watching you, so you have a lot of choices. Make the right one.

Ladies take care of your own hearts.

Hopefully this will make someone smile, another rethink her choices, and another woman prepare.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them and an entire lifetime to forget them.

First, I wanna say to men that ladies CAN be grimy as well, so not only is it to us, but for ya'll too. Second, everything that you read above isn't 100% correct 100% of the time. There are exceptions. I do believe that 100% of that is true 95% of the time, though. Third, there are a few things that really stuck out to me:

1. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
In the words of Chris Tucker, THIS IS RIIIGHT! IT CAN'T GET NO RIGHTER! I'm guilty of making every excuse in the world for a guy...on more than 1 occasion. Ladies (and gents) STOP STOP STOP making excuses for why you and your wanna-be boo aren't together. Too many times I hear females say "I mean, I know he wants to be with me, but...." NO!! Keep it movin boo boo...keep it movin! Do you!! If he decides he wants to come back around later, it's left up to you whether or not you want that. BUT the Bottom line is, if someone really wants to be with you, they will be with you!

2. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't be friends! A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
Because I'm so into friendships, building them, and keeping them, I definitely have the hardest time with this one, but it should be applied. Unfortunately you'll hurt someone you love, its inevitable. Everyone screws up in life, but true friends do NOT continuously hurt you. Someone who truly cares for you will NOT continuously hurt you. Point.Blank.Period!
Note to all: Just because someone breaks up with you doesn't mean they're grimy. If they're being straight up and for some reason can't be in a relationship, yes you'll be hurt, but that's not them being grimy. Remember your heart doesn't always do what your mind tells it to. You can't help who you like, care for, or love, but you can always help how you treat them and the situation you're in with them. Be straight up, do NOT be grimy. I repeat DO NOT BE GRIMY!

3. All men are NOT dogs.
Yes ladies, it's true. As much as I'd like to say they all are, Not all men are dogs. You can't blame every man for the mistakes of the last one. Let go of the baggage....wait, did I really just type that?!?! I can't believe I just typed that!!!

We all know this is common sense stuff. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out, yet we constantly need to be reminded of things like this. Hopefully this will help some people, and remember, this goes for men as well, not just women. Take care of your hearts!

I'm out!

-Raye

INSECURITY : Camouflaged in confidence and boldness. Exposed on Facebook.

People hide their insecurity in many, many ways. Let’s face it - the mind is full of self-defense mechanisms. Insecurity can turn us into someone we really are not.

For instance, let’s take the club scene that was so well defined in the previous Blogs. Someone who is the life-and-soul of the party may very well be that extrovert in order to keep an inner hurt from being discovered. It's a kind of camouflage, and it works like this: "If people don't see the real me, they cannot hurt the real me. If they upset the outer me, that's OK. But they won't because I'm the life and soul of the party."

Insecurity plays out even more in relationships. Most people seek a soul mate to love them unconditionally. But those who need such acceptance most—the terminally insecure—often sabotage their own chances of finding true love because of constantly questioning their own actions and the actions of their significant other.

So, how to solve it? I know one thing: DON'T post it on Facebook.

Let me preach to the choir for a second...and please correct me if I'm wrong! -- Facebook exposes the insecurity of so many women. It is truly SAD that women are revealing their most personal and intimate thoughts on their profile statuses.

Let’s take a few good examples. (All are examples and not taken from actual profiles)

Krissy is…“I trusted you. I gave you my all. Sometimes the person you want the most, you're better off without"

Sarah is… “I guess that’s all I mean to you…then so be it”

Mary Jane is.. “Shakin off these haters! If they only knew how much I DIDN'T care!” … (really? You didn't care what people thought, so you posted a status to tell the whole world that? Umm ok. Not buying it.)

Let me end by saying this – ladies, by posting your reactions, emotions and details of the most private aspects of your life in a facebook status– you are ultimately portraying yourself as insecure. Be confident, be bold, but don’t be stupid- don’t use a daily facebook status in order to momentarily uplift yourself in the midst of a personal struggle. Pray about it. Buy a Journal. Call a friend. Better yet, make a blog with an ambiguous message. 2,000 of your friends don't need to know that John Doe played you and now you’re lost in the struggle. Cuz after seeing that status, John Doe and all his friends are gonna clown you as well.

_HIL_

Confidence: Boldness' Twin Sister

On your journey to embody boldness, don't forget about her imperturbable twin sister-- Confidence.

With the summer steadily creeping upon us, it is essential to remember that although Confidence and Boldness are two separate entities, they go hand in hand.

A close friend of ours, Merriam-Webster, said it best: Confidence is a feeling or consciousness of one's powers or of reliance on one's circumstances. It is a state of mind or a manner marked by easy coolness and freedom from uncertainty, diffidence, or embarrassment.

Let that marinate.


Now, if you're reading this and thinking to yourself, "Dang, my Confidence is mad weak," DON'T FRET, there is good news; Confidence CAN be learned (practice makes perfect). Use Summer 2008 as a trial run.

All you need to do is put your Confidence into practice. Picture this: You're at the club with your girls, dancin' ultra hard. Dancin' harder than you've ever danced before. Your footwork is on point...you got mad people lookin' your way. Next thing you know, a dude lookin' finer than a Greek God (see photo) walks by. What do you do? Walk up to that dude and say these exact words, "I saw you eyein' me from across the room. I'll take a Long Island Iced Tea." Look at him deeply in his eyes. If you get rejected, move on to the next!! The beauty of the club scene is that it allows you to interact with people you'll probably never see again. The perfect practice field.

But remember, Confidence and cockiness are two separate things. While cockiness refers to being arrogant and conceited, Confidence refers to a state of mind that requires 100% certitude.

A popular icon of the 90's, Fresh Prince integrates Confidence into his daily lifestyle while roundin' up mad females:

If you ever find yourself feeling low and lacking self-confidence, immediately do the following: Go to the mirror and look at yourself. Say the words "I'm Fine" 10 times aloud. Yell if you have to! Do this 3 times daily. Refer back to this blog for more advice if Low Self-Confidence persists.

Now go forward with Confidence and do the damn thing!

~Dev

BOLDNESS!!!!!

1. fearless, adventurous, brave, valiant, intrepid, valorous, dauntless.
2. Bold, brazen, forward, presumptuous may refer to manners in a derogatory way. Bold suggests impudence, shamelessness, and immodesty

....Yes, we stooges have named BOLDNESS the theme of the summer. Why, you ask? How many of you have ever been out at a restaurant/bar/club, and have seen somebody who you thought was extremely attractive? You’re single, you’re not sure if they're single, and you’re not sure if he or she would even give you the time of day; so you give them many, many long hard glances, comment to your friends on how FOINE you think this person is, fantasize about he or she being on your arm, and let the chance to introduce yourself slip by. It happens on a daily basis. There are a few reasons why I haven’t gone up to those people, who off of looks alone, COULD BE MY BABY DADDY: lack of CONFIDENCE and fear of REJECTION!

If it’s one thing I have learned over the past yr. it’s that men like confident women! There could be many reasons as to why a woman isn’t confident/secure with herself, which will be addressed on another occasion. A lof of us women aren’t confident in our looks. As a female, half of what we think is absolutely horrific on our bodies, men don’t even notice NOR do they care about. Seriously! I’ve heard some friends (including myself, i'm my friend) talk about their stretch marks, dimples, big asses, saying they're getting fat...all of which I’ve heard men say isn’t a deal breaker. In the words of Katt Williams, “I think I speak for all the real men in attendance tonight when I say we don’t have time to be worried bout no sh*t like stretch marks. We know they came from either one of 2 thangs, either you was big and got small, or you was small and got big, either way...." yea, you know the rest.

Regardless of what you look like, your confidence can get you a LONG way. If I had to choose between a confident AIGHT looking man and a low self esteem/non confident FINE man, I’d choose the aight lookin one first. Please let it be known that there is a very fine line between cockiness and confidence. Cocky guys make me want to throw up in my mouth, to be honest with you; but there’s nothin sexier than an educated, confident man who has all his stuff together.

So my challenge to you for the next time u hit a club is to walk in there like you’re the FINEST girl or guy that’s ever walked the face of this earth. Who cares what you really look like? It’s all about your confidence. It will get you so much further. If you see a sexy girl or guy in the club, walk up to them. The most they can do is walk away or say no, and in that case you’ll probably never see them again anyway. Best case scenario, you'll get them digits ;-) If it’s been a while since you put that pimpin game to work, do a quick warm up when u get to the club. Walk up to a less attractive individual (cuz we all know they’re out there) and roll that game out, just to see if you still got it. I promise ya'll that Dev, Hil, and I do this on a WEEKLY basis....TRUST me when I tell you. Be bold!!
If you knew you wouldn't get rejected, what would you try to accomplish??

BOLDNESS:SUMMER ’08:GO GET WHAT YOU WANT!!!!

-Raye

....and We Introduce to You: The 3 Stooges

What up World! We're the 3 Stooges. We are 3 best friends who come from 3 totally different backgrounds. After 3 years of knowin each other, we've come to the realization that our lives, thoughts, and experiences are worth writing about. We met at Wake Forest University, had 2 of the craziest years together, and the rest is history. We live life to the fullest, no exceptions. We're all very different, very unique, but alike in so many ways. Here's a little bit about ourselves......

Raye, 23, Indianapolis

Raye is from a small town right outside Indianapolis and is a born and raised Colts fan. She's very strong minded, stubborn, and loves saying whatever is on her mind. Her personality is unique in its own way with a little tom-boyish twist. Being athletic, working out, and watching football are among her many interests. Raye's relationships with the people she cares about are extremely important to her. Anyone who knows her knows that laughing is one of Raye's main hobbies, she always finds a way to have fun regardless of where she is, and she's down to have a great time. She's always tried to live by the motto "never let 'em see you sweat", but is now ready to open up and reveal the sensitive side that she rarely lets others see. This blog thing is something she said she'd never do so this should be interesting....STAY TUNED!

Hilary, 22, San Francisco

Hilary was born and raised all over the map, but she likes to call the bay area home. She's a risk taker, a passionate lover, and most of all enjoys making people laugh. Back in middle school she was voted "Class Clown," in high school "Most likely to make people laugh" and this still rings true today. Hilary is now in the midwest holdin it down as a young woman trying to climb the lovely corporate ladder. Money is indeed Power! Other than that, Hilary DOES have a sensitive side that she RARELY shows (but now will be revealed on this blog). Let the games begin!

Devin, 21, Dallas

Devin is from the great state of TEXAS and is a die-hard Dallas Cowboys fan. She is about to embark on her senior year of college as a psychology major at Wake Forest. She is athletic, loves sports, and spends a considerable amount of time at the gym. She is down-to-earth, extremely blunt, and loves to joke around. She values relationships and loves to interact with different types of people. The youngest of the stooges, she enjoys being in the spotlight. Not typically the emotional type, she is beginning to tap into her more sensitive side...hence, the creation of this blog. Buckle up, cuz it's about to be a crazy ride!

Even though we're apart...we're together in spirit.

Welcome to our blog. Enjoy!